Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
we went from five shot glasses to three in one night. we lost 'badass' and gumbi, but the ninja turtle survived. courtney says to avoid any more casualties we're not allowed to use shot glasses past 1am. and we're not allowed to throw them
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
Randomize
