Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
i took my goldfish out of his bowl last night and put him in my bed
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
I saw him and didn't have sex with him. Responsibility five!
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
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