5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
Randomize
