i think you shook his penis after he was done peeing.
I'm going to write a book about John. It's going to be called big dreams, little dick
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize
