also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
He came in, laid on our floor and started to make a snow angel.. On the floor. Then he just left never said a word. 20 mins later walked back in and dropped his pants, looked down and said "wow im happy i had boxers on."
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
I think I have vodka in my lungs
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
Things I have learned since the start of my first college spring break: do not fart in an enclosed space (such as a shower stall) when hungover. You will throw up. More lessons to follow as week continues.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
Randomize
