lets start a swedish sibling band together
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
Kayla got stiches in her face. Rode in an ambulance shotgun. Tried to steal a baby, thought it was mine
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
Having a man strip on demand was an awesome way to start birthday. What more could a girl ask for? U the best!
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
Put an egg in my coffee filter this morning. I think I am still drunk.
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
Randomize
