How does everyone that never saw me naked know I'm built like a smurf?
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
I just got a rock from a customer. Weirdest. Tip. Ever.
Next thing I know her tits are out on my desk. It was straight out of a porno. What was I supposed to do I’m not made of stone
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
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