She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
My mom just told me to drench my entire body in vodka for 20 minutes. I have never been this russian. no one has ever been this russian
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
I have migrated to the couch. Minimal movement is still happening, but I should be mobile enough to go to the liquor store by eight.......so that good.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
My new hobby is moving his stuff to random places in the house. Good luck making a smoothing at 6:30 in the morning, the blender top's in the dog food container
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
Randomize
