ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
last nights episode of shot friends brought to you by polish vodka and flamingo baseball. pickles cure hangovers.
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
fyi, pepper spray hurts. whoever comes up with the best backstory wins a prize.
Let's play another riveting game of "Whose boxers are hanging on my fence?"
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
Randomize
