It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
he made that chewbacca noise when he came. like father like son i guess.
I'm eating cookie dough with a tongue depressor for lunch.
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
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