she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
I just spent a chunk of my Christmas money on Plan B. I don't think that's what my relatives had mind when they said "spend it wisely", but hey, it was a good investment considering the bad life choices i made last night.
she added me on facebook and her celebrity doppelganger is rosie odonnel. FUCK
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
Randomize
