Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
If you die in college, do you die in real life?
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
Why am I sleeping on top of the fridge?
You were playing hide and seek with the dog. she couldn't find you and you passed out.
Randomize
