if i hurry i can finally have sex while stoned off my ass
godspeed.
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
I think the universe has a conglomeration of sentences reserved only for me.
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
My greatest achievement in life thus far is being the go to friend when you have questions about butt plugs.
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
Who knew sons of strippers would be really feminist boyfriends?
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
Randomize
