It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
I need moral support for this bender
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
i'm not so sure everythign we did last night was legal...
He expects a blow job at the movies but won’t pay for popcorn? Does he know it’s not 2017 anymore
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