id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
