i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
When you get home there will be live fish in the bathtub. I did not put live fish in the bathtub.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
Randomize
