I must be too annoying 4 u.
I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
you're expensive. Idk about all this. What happened to free make outs?
Sobriety and mild self-respect
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
Randomize
