Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
He came on my chin and called me cumbledore. i give up.
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
Make way for the handjob queen! She will grab what she wants, when she wants, and from whomever she wants.
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
She shit all over my seat. She is not allowed in my car under any circumstances. Not even with drugs. You can't forgive a shit.
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
Randomize