I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
She just asked me if I was looser "in the vagina" than her. While gyrating.
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
Randomize
