you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
if you do not get any action from him tonight, I am personally walking my drunk ass over there grabbing his tongue and sticking it in your mouth. this is getting ridiculous
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
If its not for food we ain't going out.
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
I made him dinner in just his cowboy hat and my boots after we did it...you should see his face :)
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