eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
im calling her cock vulture from now on
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
Sorry, not ignoring you.. We broke open the other piñata left from cinco de mayo and it was filled with condoms, mini booze bottles, and those little party horn things you blow into. You'll forgive me when we're fucking for days with all these free condoms.
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
Yup, found the vomit in the side compartment. My bad.
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
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