How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
I just duct taped myself into my costume. I apologize in advance if you find me in a compromised position involving duct tape and underwear when you get home tonight
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
Randomize