I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
There should be a company that sends nadgrams. They're like candy grams except the recipient gets kicked in the balls.
No dude, I'm not naming my kid after your beard
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
It's been two dates and she just invited me to her aunts funeral. I can't even. Who the fuck does that? I need to drink I'm coming to get you in 5
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
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