the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
Went to go look for a friend that was missing since 3am, found her passed out in the hallway of the apartment, guessing it was a good night
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
Hahah I’ve never had someone stop me mid-coitus to tell me how amazing I am. Def ego boost.
Randomize
