3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
Randomize
