Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
Randomize
