That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
Which is scary since we both think with our vaginas
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
Randomize
