I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
Randomize
