i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
I'm exhausted and I have velveeta stuck in my teeth
Did you eat out Derrek's girlfriend again?
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
Just had my butthole waxed. If that changes your plans for Saturday..
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
Randomize
