Laying in bed naked with the guy I just fucked, talking to his WIFE who's sitting across from us like we're having a fucking tea party. This is interesting.
My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
So... In conclusion, do I bring my vibrator and risk not only having it getting taken out at security, but also exposing my dad to my neon green vibrator, or just leave it here?
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
Randomize