It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
I came so hard I burst a blood vessel in my eye. If i cant marry this girl, I'm gonna have to switch teams.
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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