He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
Psh a bachelors degree is the new adulthood. We're all just pretending anyways. I'm sitting on my boyfriends couch while he's passed out drunk. In my lap. On a Wednesday. And he's a nurse. See, pretending to be an adult
..puke & rally mid art final. HAPPY CINCO DE MAYO!
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
In my top drawer right now, there are see's chocolates, condoms, weed, and my vibrator. One way or another, this is going to be a good night
About to go make a man out of a 24 year old boy
As I shove my ninth taquito of the day into my mouth...
Picking our battles
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
You're a disaster
Wanna date?
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
Randomize
