Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
ughh I puked about 4 times on metro, no one seems to like the cool design I made on my shirt
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
My passport was stamped in Canada two weeks ago. One step closer to uncovering wtf happened that night
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
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