I'm having a terrible night. Can I sleep over?
Too tired to pretend that I care : (
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
Hospital. He tried giving some kid a stone cold stunner during a real fight.
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
so, give him that "thank you for fighting for my freedom bj" & he wont even remember what you said in that six min voice mail.
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
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