Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
i dont know, i woke up and he was going down on me. i guess i can save his number
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
That reminds me of the morning I woke up on the sidewalk covered in chicken wings
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
Dude, some chick came over here earlier and thought my lube was hand sanitizer. She poured it all over her hands.
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
Randomize
