I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
Just heard my neighbor say "I'm just gonna lay down in a coma until someone comes into my room and hands me a beer." He's got his priorities straight
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
Also I told several people at the bar last night that my dad the alligator wrestler died wrestling an alligator. So if anyone asks that's real.
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
Randomize
