The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
Ok. So I've woke up in a hospital. New thing to top that.... Waking up and realizing you've been locked inside the bar by urself at 430 am and all the doors are locked by key
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
No celebraish? But today's the day that Jesus, Bruce Springsteen, and a flock of bald eagles came down from the heavens in fighter jets with electric guitars and M-16s a blazon, saying "Hey America, fuck the Red Coats, it's time to party"
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
Randomize
