I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
Life isn't about who you kiss, drunk, at midnight. It's who you text nonsense to, sober, from the toilet.
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
Randomize
