Christians are straight up FREAKS
and then I told her I was too drunk. She started to cry, and told me this always happens to her and that she thinks shes ugly. I pretended I was asleep and then she farted.
'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
My brother really should've known better than to make me go egg hunting with his daughter when I was entirely too drunk to do so. Threw up in a plant in front of her.
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
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