I woke up this AM and all of my clothes i wore last night are gone. Instead i am dressed in air jordans, boxers, cargo shorts, and an Affliction t-shirt. the part that upsets me most is that i was with a guy who wears Affliction t-shirts.
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
Bring a bathing suit and your good liver.
My good liver is still at the dry cleaners. Will my backup liver suffice?
Maybe
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Randomize
