They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
this party is like a fast-foward into the future when im 40 and married with children
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
You're dating a nurse! That's smart, you never know when you'll have a medical emergency. Probably liver failure.
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
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