so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
I just tried to unlock my house with the car remote
I really liked your hair last night but that style makes it really hard to hold it while you puke
this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
he told me i smelled like babies and pine needles and he wanted to bathe with me. new boyfriend is not a keeper
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
