who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
It came up in court that I told the arresting officer my name was Thomas Jefferson, and I was born in 1776. I almost kept a straight face. Almost.
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
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