perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
Well the good news is my "i'm an adult" dinner party went well, they all brought wine and complimented my cooking abilities. the bad news is i woke up with the leftovers in my bed/on my face
On a separate but also a very relevant note, can we practice drinking wine like real people?
Little boy scout stared at me with judgmental looks while I bought 3 bottles of liquor but refused to buy popcorn from him
I've made friends with the guy dressed as a gorilla that was chasing the guy dressed as a banana around with a super soaker full of vodka. I feel this will be a good relationship for me.
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
Sorry I pissed in your closet and lied to your parents that it was probably a flood. He got up to go to the bathroom, expecting sex when he got back, I panicked
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
