I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
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