Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
Anytime you have a hot, flirty, married woman that wants to ride you like a horse and slap your ass, you've got to do it.
Yeah, but four times?
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
Thanks for gettin' me home, killa. Have no IDEA how I woke up pants-less on the bathroom floor at 4a.m. You're like a big, angry guardian angel.
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
Lo siento on account of my penis...
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