We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
You're breaking my sexual little heart
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
Randomize