I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
Randomize
