he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
You called me at 4am shouting drunk shit about Poland and asking me to 'come out and play.' Where the fuck were you?
Poland
I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die?
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
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