HIV tests are more positive than that guy
The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
I know it basically makes me the worst feminist ever, but I don't want to kill my own spiders. And I will pay my personal spider hit man with sammiches and unlimited , uninhibited access to my vagina.
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
I just fixed my mom's tv over the phone in 2.17 minutes while high. I'm a fucking professional.
Shit is getting real. I just adjusted my search radius for my dating profile to ANY FUCKING WHERE
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
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