Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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